Advaitha, Completion, eN-Relationship, Inspiration

How can I trust people? What if they take advantage of me? How do I start trusting after I have been hurt by others?


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First thing, as long as you have some business understanding bargain, do not call that as “trust”. If you have been hurt, it must be in bargains, never in trust. Trust is a pure powerfulness to experience about you, and the surety, certainty, guarantee you experience about others just by the way of Oneness, not by the way of their words or commitments, the way they talk to you; it is the way they make you feel about you and them. Understand, the way they carry their being into you and they carry you into them. “Trust” is surety given by the being, not by the words; honest to the being, not to any words. So, if you have been hurt, be very clear, earlier you might have had bargaining relationship, not trust. So, do not call bargaining relationship, business relationships, as trust, and lose the ability to trust anybody. It is a very, very, very serious miss you will do in your life! No! That will be a very costly mistake!

And same way, don’t call your irresponsibility to gauge the other person as “you trusting and they taking advantage”. Most of the time, you complain about the other person that they took advantage of you. But if you look back, you were irresponsible in gauging them! You were irresponsible, that is the truth! Don’t cover up your irresponsibility, saying, ‘I trusted them!’ Did they give you word? Did they give you commitment? And even when they committed are they whole, complete? Was their whole being committed, or only one part of them committed? Or do they have the capacity to hold their words and commitments? Is he a matured man, integrated being, who has the capacity to stand by his commitment? You need to look into all that. You are responsible! Look into that! You cannot say your irresponsibility can be justified. You just blame others that they took advantage of you. Most of the time people blame others that they took advantage of them because of their own irresponsibility. At least be very clear, YOU were irresponsible in that relationship, so that you will retain the ability to trust the next person in your life responsibly. If you give a wrong word, saying, ‘I trusted, and they took advantage of me!’, you will lose the capacity to trust. This is one of the important dimensions of life which should never be lost.

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